I am a survivor of extremely severe ritualistic childhood abuse and sadistic systematic torture. This blog has helped me get my voice back and documents the journey I'm on to heal from the trauma and damage caused by that appalling abuse. Now is the time for me to tell of MY experience by speaking the truth about MY life. I will be silenced no more! On this blog I share MY life, MY healing journey; helpful quotes/stuff I come across and MY thoughts along the way. The more I speak out the more liberated I am from the shame and trauma of the abuse. My broken wings are gradually being repaired. Without God in my life I wouldn't still be here. But somehow, I keep on staying alive, surviving and rarely, occasionally, living a little!

Friday, 1 May 2009


I just had to write to tell you how much I love you and care for you. Yesterday I saw you walking and laughing with your friends. I hoped that soon you'd want Me to walk along with you too. So, I painted you a sunset to close your day and whispered a cool breeze to refresh you. I waited-you never called-I just kept on loving you.

As I watched you fall asleep last night, I wanted so much to touch you, I spilled moonlight onto your face-trickling down your cheeks as so many tears have. You didn't even think of Me: I wanted so much to comfort you.

The next day I exploded a brilliant sunrise into glorious morning for you. But you woke up late and rushed off to work - you didn't even notice. My sky became cloudy and my tears were the rain.

I love you. Oh, if you'd only listen. I really love you. I try to say it in the quiet of the green meadow and the blue sky. The wind whispers My love throughout the tree tops and spills it into the vibrant colors of all the flowers. I shout it to you in the thunder of the great waterfalls and compose love songs for the birds to sing for you. I warm you with the clothing of My sunshine and perfume the air with natures sweet scent. My love for you is deeper than the ocean and greater than any need in you heart. If you'd only realize how I care.

My Dad sends His love. I want you to meet Him-He cares too. Fathers are just that way. So, please call on Me soon. No matter how long it takes I'll wait- because I love you.

Your Friend, Jesus

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