I am a survivor of extremely severe ritualistic childhood abuse and sadistic systematic torture. This blog has helped me get my voice back and documents the journey I'm on to heal from the trauma and damage caused by that appalling abuse. Now is the time for me to tell of MY experience by speaking the truth about MY life. I will be silenced no more! On this blog I share MY life, MY healing journey; helpful quotes/stuff I come across and MY thoughts along the way. The more I speak out the more liberated I am from the shame and trauma of the abuse. My broken wings are gradually being repaired. Without God in my life I wouldn't still be here. But somehow, I keep on staying alive, surviving and rarely, occasionally, living a little!

Thursday, 25 February 2010

Shame Requires You To Keep Quiet

Shame requires you to keep quiet to protect itself and keep itself hidden. Transparency exposes shame and starts the healing process.

I saw a friend on facebook post this comment earlier today and thought wow it just says it all!!!

The vows of silence I took – many I made to myself, others forced on me by my parents and other abusers, go so deep and it is extremely hard and painful to break those vows, they kept terrible, terrible acts secret and hidden, it is excruciatingly difficult to break my silence.

I am so glad that I began this journey no matter how painful or difficult it is, it does feel good to be exposing the shameful secrets and finding it removes the shame and brings peace to areas which have always only be tormented.

As I began my healing journey it was very hard to open up and I had to determine and work really hard to stay open and not close up again. But by writing about what happened to me and the healing processes involved I’m being transparent and enabling healing to happen, bringing out into the open what had previously been hidden and shameful and transforming everything in the process!!

25 Feb 2010

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