Shifting, churning, sliding, changing, tumbling, shaking, stumbling, everything wibbly wobbly, insecure, slipping
The tectonic plates of my life are all shifting around, earthquakes and tremors mean solid rock is becoming liquid under my feet, how can rock become liquid like that?
Slipping, sliding, shaking, moving, shifting, stumbling, shifting sands, rocks, wibbly wobbly, insecure, nothing is certain, everything wobbling around, right from the very core, so insecure, so unsure, so afraid, yet I know it’s gonna be ok
Earthquake, tremors, ground is sliding under me, buckling, shaking, opening up in front of me, yawning chasms, jumping the gaps, trying not to slip, sliding, falling, wobbling, all over the place, everywhere I turn solid ground is shifting and turning into huge chasms so deep, too deep to see
So deep, so very deep, scary, nothing solid, nothing secure, climbing obstacles, jumping gaps, nothing solid, nothing to hold on to, jumping, slipping, holding on, falling, everything shifting, changing all around me, please stop, it’s gotta stop sometime, please stop, yet something in me knows it’s gonna be ok
It’s gotta stop sometime, just gotta weather this, it can’t go on forever, it can’t keep shifting and buckling, keep balancing, jumping, shift with each movement, go with the flow, go with it, don’t resist or go against it, it will stop eventually, it will be ok, I know that it’s gonna be ok, eventually
19th April 2010
I am a survivor of extremely severe ritualistic childhood abuse and sadistic systematic torture. This blog has helped me get my voice back and documents the journey I'm on to heal from the trauma and damage caused by that appalling abuse. Now is the time for me to tell of MY experience by speaking the truth about MY life. I will be silenced no more! On this blog I share MY life, MY healing journey; helpful quotes/stuff I come across and MY thoughts along the way. The more I speak out the more liberated I am from the shame and trauma of the abuse. My broken wings are gradually being repaired. Without God in my life I wouldn't still be here. But somehow, I keep on staying alive, surviving and rarely, occasionally, living a little!